of Birthdays and such

My sister Sandy's birthday was this past week so went over to my mom's house to celebrate. Although it was a small group, but it was nice to be together, the kids running around, the adults enjoying each others' company, and lots of good food.



I can't believe that Sandy and I are 34! Could it really be 25 years ago that we celebrated her ninth birthday, the year our parents got married? In 25 years of being Sandy's sister a lot of life has happened. As children, we got along pretty well, as we shared a room and were only 9 months apart in age. Moving into adolescence proved a little tricky, and our relationship cooled for several years. Now that we are adults, we have reconnected and our lives overlap in many circles- like church, Bible study, and play group. It is such a blessing to be a part of each others' lives, to have our kids grow up playing with each other, to get to know each other on a different, adult level. Although we are not sisters by birth, the Lord brought our families together so that we became sisters through marriage, and now he has worked in our hearts and lives so that we are truly friends. I can't wait to see what the next 25 years bring!

Traditions

My mom was always big on traditions when we were growing up. I think it had a lot to do with the fact that we were a blended family, and she and my dad wanted to make sure we built memories as a family. It gave us all something to look forward to each season and at the same time we could look back to past years and remember what we had done.

I am reminded of a tissue paper craft I once did with E. We had several sheets of colored paper which we cut into different shapes, and then glued onto waxed paper. We layered the different colors, and then put a black contruction paper frame around it. When we held it up to the light, the colors blended and overlapped, as well as stood out in contrast to each other.

My families' past is like that window of light that E and I created. Each memory is like a scrap of tissue paper. The memories might different colors for the different years, but each shape is the season or holiday that defines it- Christmas may be squares, Easter circles, or summer vacation the triangles. My parents kept that shape for us in the traditions we kept. The colors might have changed as the years went on, but what shaped our memories stayed the same.

I have been thinking about these memories as Ed and I try to shape the seasons and holidays for our own family. We too, have built traditions into our lives- apple picking, valentine breakfasts, July 4th parades, and of course the many ways we celebrate Christmas throughout the month of December. This past Saturday we decided to introduce the kids to a new tradition that I had enjoyed as a kid- the light show in Center City. We took the train down to Market East, and walked the block to the department store.
When my family used to go, it had been "Wanamaker's" now it is "Macy's". The memories came back as we entered- I knew exactly which way to go, even though it has been almost 25 years since I was last there. The place was packed, but we got a spot to watch as the lights dimmed and Julie Andrews' voice rang through the store. It amazed me that the show was exactly the same, although in the modern times of the Comcast light show in 3-D, the kids weren't as impressed or thrilled as I remember being when I saw it for the first time. We then followed the flow of the crowds up the escalators to the Dicken's Village display of The Christmas Carol .
It too, was exactly as I remembered it, although we didn't have to wait in line back then- I remember racing through the display with my siblings a couple of times as we were the only ones there. This year the crowds snaked through the display, shoulder to shoulder. The kids listened as I read the story out loud to them from the posted signs, but it felt a little rushed, and I think it may have been hard to hear with all the background noise.
The one thing that was missing was the real electric "El" in the kid's department. It used to run around the ceiling, and my sisters and brother and I would get a thrill as we rode it and looked down on our parents waiting below. I understand that it is now on display at the Please Touch Museum, but it doesn't run anymore.

We didn't linger in the city, as it was mid afternoon and K was ready for her nap. On the return trip home the kids discussed their favorite parts with us (predictably, the train ride). I don't know if this will become a yearly tradition for our family, but in sharing this part of my childhood with my children, I am sharing part of myself, part of who Papi was, and in turn, it becomes part of who they will be.

Family Photoshoot

I am always admiring my friend Judy's photographs, and so when she offered to take pictures of our family, I jumped at the chance! She had us meet at a nearby mansion and we had a little photoshoot. The lighting was perfect, and we ended up with some really nice shots. The older kids did a great job posing and smiling,




but K's smile was elusive.

She had just woken up from a nap, and was in a funk.

Nevertheless, Judy captured a few smiles despite K's best attempts to thwart her.

I am excited that we got some photographs for our Christmas card this year. I wasn't sure what I was going to use, so this was great. Thanks Judy!!

Fourth of July Weekend

Each year we have to decide where we spend the Fourth of July. Hard life, right? On the one hand, my mom lives right on a major parade route. This parade includes many floats, bands, fire trucks and even the Shriners on their mini motorcycles. She has a large front porch where we set up tables and chairs. We drag the grill up there and we grill up burgers and dogs while watching the festivities. The kids sit on the curb and jump up to collect candy thrown at them. The adults sit back in canvas chairs with a cold soda or beer in hand, and we talk, watch, and eat as the hour and a half long parade passes by. It is alot of fun.


On the other hand, there is Pine Beach. This is where Ed's parents have a house, and they go down there for most of the summer. We join them several weekends, but the 4th is when we know Ed's brother, Jim, and his family will be there. There is a small parade with one band, lots of kids on bikes and many LOUD firetrucks. Then there are races for each age level and gender for the kids to participate in, as well as a peanut scramble. But the best part is the fireworks on the River. We take our chairs and blankets down to the beach, and have a great view of the fireworks display. On top of that, it is fun to spend the time with the relatives, and we usually throw in a day at the ocean.

Last year, it was a doubly hard decision because my sister from France was visiting my parents, and there was uncertainty (as always) about my dad's health. Yet this was the weekend that Ed's siblings had decided to celebrate their parents' retirement. I was especially torn, as I felt that this could be the last 4th on the porch with my dad. But Ed felt it was important to be there for his parents, so we went to the River. We had a great time, but I still can't look at pictures taken by my sisters without a pang. One gets me especially- it is my dad sitting on the steps, surrounded by all of his grandchildren, yet our kids are missing.

All that is to say, this year it was definitely the Glenside Parade turn, but we decided to go to the river anyway. For me, it was too sad to go knowing my dad wouldn't be there with his broad grin, sitting back in his red shirt and red/white/blue hat. It would have been too hard of a reminder of what was missing, and what we had missed last year. And it was a difficult weekend for me. I felt the loss keenly and felt myself close to tears many times as it sunk in that Dad was really and truly gone.

But...

It was fun to go to the River. We started off the weekend with a trip to the ocean. This was the first year that K really could enjoy the waves, and she did! The water was numbingly cold, yet she splashed right in. Ed would hold her hand and she would pull him deeper and deeper, until the waves crashed right into her chest. She would gasp with shock at the force and coldness of water, but even as she wiped the spray from her eyes she would look up at Ed with shining eyes and laugh in delight. We had to pull her from the water to warm her up, and she would scream and kick as we carried her across the sand, pointing at the waves, "Dat water! KK want dat water!". E happily looked for shells and even ventured bravely into the surf with Ed by her side. Meanwhile, N and his cousin Erika were content to play tag with the waves.



The morning of the fourth was cool, but bright. Even as we finished up a breakfast of blueberry pancakes and bacon, we could hear the firetrucks "warming up" their sirens. In a rush we left the dishes for later, and hurried down the street to get a spot to watch the parade. Even though it is a small parade, the kids managed to collect a pocketful of dum-dums and tootsie rolls, which satisfied them.




We fled the scene as the 30 or so firetrucks came screaming down the street for the final 15 minutes of the parade. Following the parade are the races at the park. E and N both ran, and even though they didn't finish anywhere near the top 3, they were proud to receive their ribbon for participating.




That afternoon was spent lounging in the yard as the kids played around us, and then we had a picnic of fried chicken, potato salad and s'mores.


We ended up the evening with a walk to the river where the kids played in the sand as we waited for the fireworks to begin.
K once again showed her love for the water. As soon as we got their she pulled off her shoes and socks and I rolled up her pants so that she could wade in. I think if I had let her she would have gone in deeper, but as it was, I kept a sharp eye on her and she stayed ankle deep.


The sunset was brilliant that night, the colors deepening and becoming richer with each passing minute.

It finally all settled into an inky purple as the first sparks flew up. It was the highlight of the day, and what we had been waiting for, and the experience didn't disappoint. When the last "ooh" had faded, we walked home through the darkened streets. The kids were cranky and ready for bed, so we didn't do the sparklers. After getting them settled, we gratefully sank into our own beds. The day was over, and another year had come and gone.

Visiting

My brother Andrew, and his wife Erin came for a visit last week. They live in Chicago, so their visits are few and far between (about twice a year). My kids love them. They don't have any kids of their own yet, so they have lots of love and energy for their nephews and nieces. Andrew is, by far, their favorite uncle. He picks them up and flies them around, teases them, gives them shoulder rides, and is just really interested in them in a genuine way. He doesn't talk down to them and his love for them is evident, and in return, they love him back fiercely. As for me, I too look forward to their visits. Andrew has a great sense of humor, and always comes out with one-liners that has the whole room laughing. Erin is so sweet, and a perfect compliment to Andrew. We have whole-heartedly embraced her as a sister, and look forward to these times to spend with her as well as him.

We saw them 3 times over their stay, each a fun time both for the grown-ups and kids. Monday night we had them over for dinner and it was really hard to say good-bye, knowing that we wouldn't see them until December. As they hugged the kids, N would run full steam into Andrew's arms as he squatted on the floor, and bowl him over, and then back up and repeat. E just clung to him, refusing to let go. Finally though, they left and as they walked out the door E buried her face in the front of my shirt. She was noticeably upset as she got ready for bed, and when she lay down, she finally let it out. She sobbed into her pillow,"Christmas is too far away! I don't like saying good-bye! Why can't they live closer?" I tried to comfort her, but I couldn't say anything that helped, so I said good-night and closed the door on her cries. It broke my heart to see her so upset, but I have to remind myself that it is a good thing that they love their aunt and uncle so much that parting is painful. I am so glad that my kids have a relationship with my brother and sisters.

(this is a picture from Christmas, because, strangely,  I didn't get any of the kids with Andrew during this visit)

July, in summary.

I am almost afraid to post, it has been so long! I think that if anyone is left reading this blog, it's a miracle! Anyway, since I have been absent most of July, I will try to catch you up. Beware! Lots of pictures ahead!

Ok, so to start off the month we went to Ed's parents' summer place in NJ to celebrate the 4th, as well as their retirement. We went to a parade the morning of the 4th, and then to a little town celebration where the kids ran a couple of foot races and participated in a peanut scramble. Later that evening we all went out to the Lobster Shanty to celebrate the retirement, and then finished off the night with fireworks on the river.

The next weekend we spent with our friends Bob and Aimee, and their daughter (who is one of E's best friends) down at their Brigantine condo. The weather was absolutely gorgeous all weekend, and the beach is my favorite that I have ever been on. You get to it by walking through the dunes, and it is flat and uncrowded. There are even tidal pools that form up on the beach (so it goes sand/ pools/ sand/ surf) that were perfect for K to play in, although she loved the waves too. The kids really enjoyed playing in the tidal pools as the tide came in, because they formed a little stream along the beach with a current that was perfect for riding boogie boards on. It was the best weekend of the summer thus far.

The next wednesday, the 16th, we left for our yearly vacation in NH where my family has a cabin on an island on Lake Wentworth. Although we had some nice weather, the majority of the week was rainy/ cloudy. On Thursday the weather hit the peak when there was a hurricane that came through the area with a tornado that touched down on the shore of the lake. Thank the Lord that he protected us!! Despite the rain, we had fun with my sisters Cara and Sandy and Sandy's 3 year old son Elijah. The kids liked playing together, and went in the water at every break in the rain. When we asked the kids before bed each night what their favorite part of the day was, N always said, "Playing with Elijah". After the kids went to bed at night we played games and talked, enjoying each others' company without the noise of children in the background. Finally on Friday, the day before we left, we had a perfect sunny day in which we took full advantage- swimming all day, and kayaking around the lake. It was unfortunate that we had to leave the next day, another perfect day, but we were ready to go home to running water, indoor plumbing, and showers!

We actually added an extra stop on the way home, spending Saturday night in Connecticut where Ed's brother Bill, and his wife Becky were having a party for their daughter Aubrey who just turned one. It was nice to break up the trip home, and visit with Bill and Becky, as well as join in on the celebration.

Sunday we returned home, and since then I have done 10 loads of laundry! We are getting back into the routine of being home. The kids were excited to play with their toys, and I greeted my dishwasher with a big long hug. Well, not really, but I was glad to see it again! Vacation is fun, but sometimes the best part is coming home.