School starts in 5 days for E. I looked at her the other day, and felt a deep sense of regret that I hadn't done more with her this summer. I squandered the time away that we had -- on books, the computer, naps (meaning, I spent "my" time doing these things).
Her favorite thing to do is crafts, and I realized I had hardly done any crafts with her. This would have been unthinkable in my early days as a mom, as I had the finger paints out as soon as she could rub her hands in it. Now she is 7, and wants to spend time with me doing crafts, and I end up putting her off with,"Another time", "Later", "Not right now". If anything, those blogs I wrote about earlier made me realize that I don't what the future holds, and even if, Lord willing, we have many more years, I will never have this time back.
So it was with no small amount of mommy-guilt that I took out some sculpy and we spent the whole morning making beads. It was so nice sitting there, just the two of us, chatting, enjoying the quiet, creating together. I rediscovered the joy of doing something creative with my very crafty daughter. Of course the boys wanted to join in, and we let them make one bead each, but other than that it was just a special time with each other. I still feel like I failed her in some way, but maybe some redemption can be found in this handful of beads.